Monday, July 25, 2011

"SHAKEN"

All smiles on Mama when she sees her little boy!


Well, we were back from vacation and I was looking forward to a long 4th of July weekend!  Not counting the BiG Birthday I had planned for Colt on July 9th.   The 4th of July has always been a special holiday for Matt and I.   We always go to the lake, normally stay on the boat and just have fun with friends.   One of my favorite things to do is watching the fireworks burst into the sky and fizzle into the water from the top of our friends houseboat.  I did it last year while pregnant with Colt and every "boom" sound,  he would move about inside my belly (like he knew what was going on).  He wasn't due until July 28th, so I think this is what made him decide to come on July 7th.  I think he wanted to get in on the action!  Ha!  As I laid on top of our friends houseboat in a lounger, I dreamed of how this 4th of July would be.  I have this almost 1-year-old beautiful baby boy run around on top of the houseboat with me, watching the fireworks and hearing them fizzle downward until they meet water.  I was so anxious!
On Wednesday, June 29th, I decided to call my doctor to see if she would see me.   I had back pain the previous night and a little during vacation. I wanted to make sure all was okay.   I had done a lot of walking on vacation and had a gut feeling that I shouldn't wait until July 5th, which was my next ultrasound appointment.   I wore heels the previous day, so I kept thinking to myself that was all it was.  I needed to put up the heels and go with flats.  It was time!
So, I called  and they worked me in.  I just love Lexington OB,  I see Dr. Tracey Slone, who I highly recommend to everyone that is going to have a baby.  She is awesome and works closely with Dr. Barton (The Prenatal Specialist) who recommended her to me. 
I worked close that day and my appointment was at 3:00 (I think), it was towards the end of the day.  When I got there I didn't wait long in the waiting room, they took me straight back to the ultrasound room.  I could tell by the ultrasound technicians expression things were not right.  I asked her if everything was okay with the babies?   She said, "your babies are excellent, it's your cervix lining that is concerning."  I had told her I had just seen Dr. Barton on June 6 and my cervix was 4.3 cm--better than average.   Average is between 2-4 cm.  For those of you wondering why this is so important, apparently the cervix lining is what helps hold the baby or babies inside.  You want this wall (or lining) thick until closer to full term.  Within just 26 days I went from having a better than average thickness to .8cm, which is almost gone!  Remind you, I was only 21.5 weeks!  A long way still to go! 
I knew this wasn't good.  I saw the doctor (my doctor was doing a c-section) and he immediately admitted me to Central Baptist, which is a wheel chair ride over. 
The bad thing was my phone was completely dead!  I was crying because I overheard them say I was going to labor/delivery.  I thought I was going to lose my boys. The kind NP, Denise wheeled me over and let me use her phone to call my husband.  I also, called my sister before my phone had died and told her I needed her to help Matt with Colt.  I didn't know what to expect. 
I couldn't stop the tears from falling, My heart was beating out of my chest and every bad, scary thought entered my mind.  That's when your feel your world "SHAKEN".  It's the same feeling I had when I was told of the possibility of Colt's diagnosis.  My heart beating so loud, you feel everyone can hear.  Having to make myself swallow because my throat is so tight you feel like you can't breath. You world is rocked and you are left "SHAKEN" in fear of whats to come.   All is out of your control, and all you can do is pray to God for everything to settle and be alright. 
They placed me in a room, hooked me to IV's and started a medicine called magnesium sulfate  "mag".  I've heard of this from friends, never would I had dreamt it would be so bad.  It's amazing how your life is so on schedule and within a blink, you are left shaken--simply left in fear of the unknown.  
This medicine stops any contractions and doctors are able to adjust it if need be.  As soon as they started the iv, I felt the medicine burn through my veins and the nurses were putting cold (dipped in ice) washcloths all over my face and neck.  My face felt as if my skin was melting off.  It was terrible!  I mean, the worse I have ever felt.  Apparently, I was given the maximum dose of this.   Matt had arrived, and now I was puking my guts out.   I was on this drug for 2 days, I puked for 2 days.  Even ice chips made me puke.  My lips, inside my mouth and down my throat was so dry. Ice chips helped me continue to talk, which was hard for me to do. I can remember just circling ice on my lips to help me to talk. 
The doctors had discussed a cerclage.  This is when they place a stitch to keep the cervix from further thining, but with twins, there is more of a risk of breaking my water. Plus, we now know, I basically have pre-term labor and a cerclage really would be more risky than benefit.  So it was ruled out!   
I finally became stable and little to no contractions, the bad thing is, I don't feel them.  I mean at all!  So, I don't know if I am having them or not to tell the nurses.  I am wearing what they call a toco and this monitors contractions, so if they start, they can be stopped.
I was moved from labor/delivery to the antepartum unit.   I was doing good, I was on oral meds and stable.  My ultrasound on June 6th was such great news.  My cervix had thicken!  Nothing to be able to go home on, but at least I wasn't going backwards.  I went from .8cm to 1.2cm.  All was well.
Needless to say I had to cancel Colt's birthday party.  I had planned to have a bash!  Pony rides, petting zoo, games and a cookout for family and friends.  I know, a little over the top, but we have so much to celebrate.  He is healthy and we survived as new parents!  I wanted to celebrate all the joys within the past year.   I had gotten his invitations they day I was admitted.  I didn't know this, but Matt told me he saw them once he got home.   He didn't want to bring it up, because he new how hard I had planned and looked forward to it.  I will post them later to show how cute they are!!!

I have weekly ultrasounds to check cervical change.  On June 13th, we didn't hear good news.  Again, SHAKEN!!!   My cervix had thinned even more--now .2cm and I had not had any contractions.  So, some people have contractions and then start dilating, I am one of those people who dilates, then have contractions.   Frustrating!!!   So, since I was only 23 weeks and 5 days, they needed to give the babies steroids.  A side effect of steroids is "contractions".    I was moved to labor/delivery and  I had to go back on "mag".   This time I warned the nurses how much I throw-up and they gave me zofran prior.  We had our ice dipped washcloths ready. My sis-n-law came on her lunch break to take care of me, until my mother-in- law got here.  Mom and Trenda had just went home that Sunday and so they were coming back the following Friday. 
So again, felt the medicine burn in my veins, didn't throw-up right away.  I thought I was handling things a lot better, but the steroids "did" make me contract so I had to be given a bolus dose in addition. That's when I started puking and from then on I didn't stop.  Matt came and stayed with me the first night  and I think he said I had puked over 37 times.  I was now throwing up blood.  All I know I was so non-functional I couldn't even open my eyes.  I couldn't move on my own.  My sis n law had to brush my teeth cause my muscles were so weak I couldn't left my arms.  She was a great nurse!  She brushed my teeth like she does her boys, she said.  I was so thankful she was there!   This "mag" is like a huge muscle relaxer too.  That's why it works so well.  It calms the uterus which is a smooth muscle.  It does effect speech, eye lids and any other muscle you can think of .  Nurses had to pick me up to turn me from side to side. Have you ever had a dream where you wanted to run or move, but couldn't?  That's exactly how you feel.  Your mind is still thinking, but physically you can't move or do anything.  It was BAAD! 
I have to give my sis and husband props too!  My sis came on Thursday and has stayed with me everyday.  How lucky I am to have her.  I know she has to be exhausted, she has been doing everything for me.  I hate being so dependent, but she is so caring and kind, she never complains.  Trenda and my mom has helped  out so much with Colt too.  Mom comes down every weekend to help Matt with Colt, so he can cut hay and keep up the farm.  We are so lucky to have them.   Matt's mom and dad help us out taking Colt to daycare and picking him up when Matt has to work late.  It has been such an adjustment, but everyone is helping out and I'm sure they are loving Colt's company.  He is such an easy baby to watch and keep. I don't think I could ever thank everyone enough for all they are doing.  We so appreciate all the help and are so blessed to have them all.  It's a good feeling knowing little Colt is in good hands.  Matt is just amazing with him too.
So that brings you up to my current state!  I'm stable!  I'm on oral meds and they left me on labor/delivery until I make it to 28 weeks so they can monitor me a little closer.  At 28 weeks, my babies will have to have steroids again.  I haven't been told the actual game plan yet, but as aggressive as Dr. Slone and Barton are, I'm assuming I will have to go on "mag" again.  So please pray.  Its rough and exhausting!  Not to mention the mental toll of not seeing your baby, husband, home,  or work in almost 4 weeks. For the sake of these babies, and being off work for so long, I pray I'm here for 10 more weeks.  I know we are doing the best thing for our twins!  Like any mother, you do what is best for your children.   I would love to leave here with both boys, due to not having as much time off work after delivery.   I  would of never of dreamed that I would be on bed rest for so long.  I had prepared myself for the month of Sept. Taking only 4 weeks of Short term Disability and allowing myself 10weeks off with the twins after they arrive. Definitely not my "xtra" perfect plan!
I know there is a reason for all of this, and I feel positive God is watching over all my boys.  I feel confident that I will make it to 28 weeks, and then I will ask God for a little more time.   These twins have came so far, I just know all will be okay.  Matt, has really impressed me with all the things he has done.  Colt literally eats him up.   Mama is just a little jealous.  I'm glad Colt will not remember any of this.  I realize this is harder on me than him, and I wouldn't want it any other way.   I know when I get home with the twins, I will need Matt helping me all I can with Colt.  There is a reason and I am staying positive. 

I will be here 4 weeks on Wednesday, July 27th!  In one way it has went by so fast, but another I feel like I should be 28 weeks along.  I have had excellent care here at Central Baptist.  I am building relationships with Doctors and nurses who are taking such Outstanding care of me.  I haven't had 1 BAD nurse yet, they all are extremely caring, they come by to check on me, even if they are not my nurse that day!  It is Simply Amazing how wonderful they are!!!  I'm so glad to be here.  I feel like I am in the Best of Hands!   Such outstanding people.  Blessed to have so many come into my life at a time that is so needed.

I'm eating good here too!  Doctors and Nurses showering me with gifts!  Just eating for the TWINS, helping them get bigger! ha!
Dr Barton brought me corn from his farm (ambrosia corn)  YUM!

Orea Balls--Delish!!!  Nurse Erin made them for me!  BEST I've ever had!!!
 

 
Please continue to Pray for us! 

I will post July 4th pics and Colt's birthday in a separte post!  Just wanted to update you on what has been going on with me. 
Taking it Day by Day! 

2 comments:

  1. Oh christy! We will pray for your and your babies safety and strength in the coming weeks we aren't able to visit because we don't live in Kentucky any more, but we are with you in spirit. God bless your family. You are stronger than you know.

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  2. Oh my, what a great mom you are! I am praying for you and for a safe delivery, much later, in your pregnancy

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